I worked in an electronics company where there was a very evangelical Christian, and he used to tell me "God want to BREAK YOU! - yes, he wants to see your life broken in pieces!" The other thing I am very suspicious about, is a theme that to be honest, seems to occur in many evangelical circles. ![]() I am greatly troubled by the importance of earthly fathers for the simple reason that if this was really true, many of us would have perished long ago, we who have none, and grew up without them. This, here, is not the same thing, but is a strange hybrid, borrowing incomplete themes from the Bible with a kind of intuitive (but, I think, wrong) neo-masculine agenda that comes from a certain brand of Californian psychotherapy. I learned to mistrust the entire genre of touchy-feely stuff, such as "The power of positive thinking" decades ago. The obvious references to false validation via gang membership are well and good, but the conclusion that EVERY man needs a father's blessing is firstly, not true by observation (many of us DON'T and would not want it) and secondly - and I was halfway through one chapter and found myself, as it were gasping for breath - where is the scriptural basis for this? My objections to this are based on very readily obtainable data concerning the complexion of US society that of incomplete and fragmented families and very absent fathers. This occurs frequently in the context of a father's blessing, and the effect that this can have on the entire emotional security of a boy, and especially a boy-turning into a man. The first objection I held was the continual reference to the centrality of "validation". There are a multitude of reasons to hold this viewpoint. The book itself, I think, is very erroneous. What disturbed me most about this book was my own reaction to it, to be precise, the huge gulf between my initial reading, and later in the same week, my realisation of exactly what the text was actually saying. I would go further and describe this book as disastrous. I agree completely with Mr Hulme's comments. He also uses the expression “far out” way too much. He loves the outdoors passionately, and all beauty, Shakespeare, bow hunting, a good cigar, anything having to do with adventure, poetry, March Madness, working in the shop, fly fishing, classic rock, the Tetons, fish tacos, George MacDonald, green tea, buffalo steaks, dark chocolate, wild and open places, horses running, and too much more to name. While all of this is factually true, it somehow misses describing an actual person. ![]() John and Stasi live in Colorado Springs with their three sons (Samuel, Blaine, and Luke), their golden retriever (Oban), and two horses (Whistle and Kokolo). He worked as a counselor in private practice before launching Ransomed Heart in 2000. John earned his master’s degree in Counseling from Colorado Christian University, under the direction of Larry Crabb and Dan Allender. John earned his undergraduate degree in Theater at Cal Poly, and directed a theater company in Los Angeles for several years before moving to Colorado with Focus on the Family, where he taught at the Focus on the Family Institute. But their romance did not begin until they each came to faith in Christ, after high school. John met his wife, Stasi, in high school (in drama class). John grew up in the suburbs of Los Angeles (which he hated), and spent his boyhood summers on his grandfather’s cattle ranch in eastern Oregon (which he loved). He is also president of Ransomed Heart, a ministry devoted to helping people discover the heart of God, recover their own hearts in God's love, and learn to live in God's Kingdom. John Eldredge is an author (you probably figured that out), a counselor, and a teacher. To learn more about how and for what purposes Amazon uses personal information (such as Amazon Store order history), please visit our Privacy Notice. You can change your choices at any time by visiting Cookie Preferences, as described in the Cookie Notice. Click ‘Customise Cookies’ to decline these cookies, make more detailed choices, or learn more. Third parties use cookies for their purposes of displaying and measuring personalised ads, generating audience insights, and developing and improving products. This includes using first- and third-party cookies, which store or access standard device information such as a unique identifier. If you agree, we’ll also use cookies to complement your shopping experience across the Amazon stores as described in our Cookie Notice. ![]() We also use these cookies to understand how customers use our services (for example, by measuring site visits) so we can make improvements. We use cookies and similar tools that are necessary to enable you to make purchases, to enhance your shopping experiences and to provide our services, as detailed in our Cookie Notice.
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